Inspired by Terry Pratchett, we've challenged the community to submit their longest funny sentence. Feel free to use whichever syntactical tricks you want, but it must be one and only one sentence total. For example, from Kathleen...

Most of the watercourses on Ravnica have been, at one point or another,  subject to ambitious Izzet League reclamation schemes that essentially paved over any river, lake, and — in the case of famously stubborn Izzet engineer Emona Plazzjok — ocean that had audacity to get in the way of civic progress.

Send your submissions to contest@desertbus.org with the subject line "Funny Sentence". Include your submission as the text content of your email. Also, please be sure to include the name you'd like to go by and your pronouns should we show your submission. We'll accept submissions until 4:30pm PST today. The winner will receive a Desert Bus T-Shirt!

We'd like to take a moment to thank one of our sponsors of this year's event: Card Kingdom!

Magic is fun. But you knew that already. Getting you the cards you need to have fun is where Card Kingdom comes in. Since 1999, Card Kingdom has been focused on making it the best place on earth to by Magic cards; they've grown into one of the world's biggest retailers of Magic: the Gathering, with two brick and mortar locations in the Seattle area. They're a family owned business that's been successful because they have the support of their community. That's why they created Engage: a charitable giving program that donates to local causes and hosts charity tournaments.

Thank you, Card Kingdom, for your support of Desert Bus for Hope 2022!

Tune in for the first session of D+B, Alpha Flight's Dungeons & Dragons adventure! Our players will be travelling in a bespoke setting designed by friend of the bus and DM, Dale. Dale will be DMing our first session; the sessions over the rest of the week will be DM'd by other members of the Alpha Flight team.

In case you missed it, here's a sneak peek of the setting we'll be using this year.

Tune in today thru Thursday at 1:30pm PST for D+B! And, in case you miss it live, check out the replays on our YouTube channel.

We here at Dawn Guard have been in quite the battle recently.
Legal battle that is.
James brought on a star witness, a man very knowledgeable in all things ghost, to prove that his many, many, MANY losses have not been his fault but in fact the work of a ghost haunting him!

And of course, despite all his proof and eye witnesses, Serge still refuses to believe him. Or should we say.....SNERGE?!?!?!

But no matter what the cause, James has LOST the first game of Coffee Pong, so the score is....

We also had an incredibly intense live auction for a beautiful clock inspired by Chrono Trigger, and it went for OVER 10K!!

Specifically, JRandomHacker won for $10,240! Thank you to everyone who bid and congratulations to the winner! We're all very jealous of you.

We also played Jeopardy (poorly), made guesses for American football (even more poorly), and guessed Scottish food by their names (perfectly, according to the players). And our first timer Carrie got to learn THE KRAKEN from Liz! Her self proclaimed mating call.

Of course, you can always go to our youtube channel to watch any of this thanks to the ALL POWERFUL VST! Thank you all for your work yet again!

I hope you enjoyed the first shift from us. So find a seat, kick back, enjoy the rest of the day, and get ready for tomorrow when more Dawn Guardian Shenanigans ensue!

If you're reading this before 10am PST on 11/13/22, you still have a chance to bid on these two wonderful pieces of art! But make sure to keep an eye out for snipers in those last few moments! You never know who will swoop in...

Fecto Elfilis Needle Felted Art Doll is our first, which is a beautfully hand felted doll based on a certain boss from a certain Kirby game. I'm trying to avoid spoilers, but if you know you know and even if you don't you should bid on this anyway because it's 3D printed and hand painted details are so good!

Lake Hylia From Breath Of The Wild is the other one, but nothing to sneeze at. This pen and ink drawing with the shape of Lake Hylia from BOTW is incredibly detailed and filled with little easter eggs. You can't fully appreciate this piece until it's in your home, so go bid!

This clock, inspired by Chrono Trigger, is going to be auctioned LIVE on stream in less than an hour! Make sure you've got your donor account set up and attached to your twitch account and then get in chat so you're ready for when the bidding begins!

Celebrating the imagery and motifs from the timeless RPG masterpiece "Chrono Trigger", this handmade clock can sit handsomely on its LED-backlit base or can be lifted out and hung on a wall with the base used as a standalone art piece. Made by Odd Fox Laser Creations.

Made from woods including Japanese tamo ash, spalted maple, and South American bocote, the clock has been sealed to protect against the passage of time. While seated on its base it measures 14"W x 17"T x 5"D and is powered by one AA battery and an optional USB cord for the LED backlight.

THREE CHEERS FOR TILTYHOUSE MEDIA! Thank you so much for sponsoring us this year! Your contributions to Zeta, Nightwatch, and DB as a whole is always welcome! Make sure to follow them on all social media things or watch their twitch streams, or listen to the many amazing podcasts they produce! All the info for the cool things they do can be found here!

We are giving away 16 entries! 8 entries early in the day (right now) and 8 entries later in the shift (not right now). Please only enter if you own the game, have the time to play and build the world up, and want to contribute to our tomfoolery!

Check our twitter or the main stream for more information and timings! And we look forward to seeing your creations!

It's been so long! It feels like a year... Because it's been a year! But Zeta is back, and in full form.

Is it really Zeta without Jock Jams?

Truly the best way to determine a giveaway amount is through a story about math... And a Tower of Hanoi problem?

Paul has joined Zeta this year, and as such, we were graced with our first Paul Song(TM)!!

So many people ask what is Bus, but here on Zeta we ask the big questions, when is Bus.

Keep Talking and Nobody Brickslodes has returned! And this time, we have color commentary:

Zeta digs into motion picture ratings, and the weirdness of Trivial Pursuit

Zeta got a new motto! And JPriceLegendary won a t-shirt!

And that is a wrap on Zeta Day One!! Keep your eyes on the stream for more fun, silliness, and honestly, who knows what else!!