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Nightwatch: Being, Like, So Cool All Night Long
November 17, 2023 at 12:19 AM PST
Posted by Soraya

What's up it's ya busssss! That's right it's Nightwatch in the house!

Graham comes in from off-screen, wearing sunglasses, a sideways hat, and a very colorful shirt. He moves in a partial crouch as he gestures emphatically to the camera.

We're the most fashion-forward shift for shhiiiiiirt. We've got CBC color, we've got BDSM (Buses Do So Much - what did you think it meant?), and we've got cool tattoos. Check us out.

Andrew and Jordan stand side-by-side. Jordan slaps his butt, then jumps to turn the side of his body towards the camera and slap it again. Andrew does not react.

We got beef, though, and not just the cake kind. VST you're on notice. Or maybe we're the ones who are on notice? Instructions unclear.

Graham points directly at the camera, his expression intense. The captions at the bottom read "The VST *knows* what you did.

Whatever, we know we're godlike. Try not to swoon.

Ian melts in the chair, rubbing the Sega CD controller lovingly against his cheek. The one on his face! Don't be nasty.

This is also the hottest spot for music. You know it, we know it, everybody knows it. And we're nice enough to share our music video recommendations. [Full Playlist Edition] Whenever it was somebody's turn to share their pick, they got to wear the cool cap. Did you hear that, mods? Turns out, caps ARE shortcuts for cool.

Jordan addresses the camera. As he speaks, Graham bolts by, drops a black and white baseball cap onto his head, and keeps going.

We even do live music if you're lucky enough to get a ticket to our concerts.

Graham, wearing a fluffy brown wig, raps on the microphone while blue and orange lights flash.

So yeah, we know we're cool. We're also kinda sleepy though and we get a little weird when we're sleepy. So Zeta, for Harry's sake, you can take it from here.

Andrew stands with arms wide in a "ta-dah" pose. Behind him, on the couch, Ian grabs Harry the Creepy Doll from a nearby chair and slams him onto the floor.

Nightly Nightwatch Nuggets: Your one-stop shop for recurring features!