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Seven-Dollar Superheroes, Assemble!
November 22, 2013 at 08:15 PM PST
Posted by Ashton

Remember the Seven Dollar Superheroes we collected from our special guests over the course of Desert Bus 7? Did you know that some of the talent and volunteers added their own too?

Here’s the full list we came up with. Have a favorite? Let us know in the comments! And if you feel inspired to draw one, send it in to stuff@desertbus.org! We’d love to see your creativity

 

Creator: James Turner

Hero: The Highwayman

Powers: Can create an overpass anywhere, anytime, to get him straight from where he is to where he wants to go.

 

Matt Fraction

The Variant

Plucks prototype products that were almost made, should have been made but weren’t — grabs them from an alternate dimension where they were made and brings them back to his dimension.

 

Bill Corbett

Mr. Tambourine Man

Man who is a tambourine who can transcend time and space. Can petrify and shatter dinosaurs.

 

Louis Moga

Nyan Man

Can summon magical fiery kittens to attack their enemies, and anyone the kittens bite is immediately set on fire.

 

Stepto

Harmony Man

Can sing perfect harmony. Can’t pick music very well.

 

Grant Imahara

Captain Forgetful

Can make you forget a 10-second span of time.

 

Bobak Ferdowsi

Brainosaurus

Giant tyrannosaurus with a giant brain and can actually tell us what happened to the dinosaurs and what their world was like.

 

Mikey Neumann

Disorder

Multiple personality disorder, each personality has a different power, and changing between them is uncontrollable.

 

Mia Steinberg

Feli Day

The ability to summon kittens from the ether, cheer you up with it, then poof it out of existence (and into a nice home).

 

Teller

Waffle Man

Uses waffle iron to make waffles or hit them. Sidekick is Maple Syrup who is a large jug with legs.

 

Penn

Chicken Head/Manfoot

Legion of evil animals.

 

Paul and Storm

83¢ Man

Can always get 83¢ from his pocket.

 

Paul and Storm

Valdeez

Can drink as much liquid as possible but pees if he gets wet.

 

Mike Mearls

American Man

Can never understand the metric system.

 

Rodney Thompson

Blackout

Narcolepsy.

 

Peter Lee

Mr. Moneybags

Giant bag of coins to hit people with. Sidekick Exact Change Boy has exact change.

 

Dan Helmick

ROYGBIV

Alien with a rainbow gun.

 

Chris Lindsay

Hubtroller

Miniaturized internet explosions.

 

Chris Tulach

The Commuter

Knows all the bus schedules for whatever city he’s in.

 

Jimmy Hinson (BCG)

Jurassic Justice

Ability to shoot dinosaurs at poor drivers.

 

Phil Plait

Hotel Curmudgeon Man

Ability to make people walk quietly late at night.

 

Harrison Krix

The Temporal Mechanic

Can fast-forward or reverse time on man-made mechanical objects.

 

Allen Schauffler (AJAM reporter)

Jib Guy

Uses the power of the wind to spread good cheer.

 

Ben “Yahtzee” Croshaw

Super Invisibility Man

The man who can turn invisible, but only while playing the trombone.

 

Ben “Yahtzee” Croshaw

[No name, BONUS second superhero]

The man who can communicate with technology but it all inexplicably hates him.

 

Bob Chipman

Cheese Man

He has power over cheese: 1. Communicate; 2. Manipulate with lacto-kinetic powers.

 

Jamie Dillion

Captain Corgi

Can summon a herd of corgis at will; either overwhelms enemies with cuteness or ferociousness

 

Jim Sterling

Lobster Regurgitator

Pins down criminals with claws and spews mini lobsters at them, then calls the cops on his cell that has moderate service.

 

Aaron Forsythe

Butter Man

Excretes butter from his hands for toast or corn. Or other stuff.

 

Tally

Scissor Girl

Anytime, anywhere, her hands can turn into any kind of scissors.

 

Bill’s Mom

Splatter

Cape made of silica gel packs. When a pack is thrown it turns into a bugsplat and forces someone to do a good deed.

 

Bill

Ginger Whirlwind

Has really long arms and spins like a tornado.

 

Steve

Cosmic Crowbar

See Middle Manager of Justice

 

Bonnie Burton

Super Snooze

Could make anyone fall asleep instantly; they’ll shut up and get the best night sleep of their lives.

 

Dale Friesen

Large Print Man

Helps people with unexpected visual problems; sidekick is Corrective Lenses.

 

Max Temkin

Captain Janeway

Navigating unknown space while upholding Federation law.

 

Small Ian

Captain Defenestration

Can generate windows anywhere and throws villains out of them.

 

Cori

Bidoof

Rollout

 

Pika

Cat-Lady Woman

Throws crazy cat ladies who then throw cats at everyone.

 

Ash

Ashra Disastra

Can calm/reverse natural disasters by shaming them into submission.

 

Jer

The Sea Chef

Cooks crustaceans humanely, i.e., without boiling them alive.

 

Kim

Salad Lass

Has a salad spinner shield, a bandolier of weaponized vinaigrettes, and the Tongs of Justice.

 

Dammit Liz

Forced Perspective

Can make anyone she talks to see her point of view.

 

Dan Wu

Fiddler on the Roof

While on a roof has a mastery of the violin.

 

Brent

Jerry Rigg

Can build anything but it’s always made of the incorrect materials.

 

Sol Kauffman

Shipman the Shippingman

Can fit anything into any size packaging and get the lowest shipping rate on it, but anything he does this to is irreversibly changed and it’s different every time.

 

Mike Whitaker

Hype-atia

Uses hip-hop dance moves to fight evil: pop-and-lock = super flexibility; b-girling = super agility; ticking = slows down time; tutting = creates force shield. Armor contains a stereo to drop sick beats.

 

Andy

Little Lady Luck

Very good at catching busses right on time; drinks milk _right_ before it expires.

 

Brendan

Garçon

Travels the world to fight against the bland flavoring of the evil La Chef Dujour wit his utility belt of spices. Sidekick is Condiment Boy.

 

Graham Stark

Awkward_Fart.wav

Can spontaneously fart on command, with complete control over sound and smell. Used primarily for comedy.

 

Kathleen De Vere

Derp Cop

He has the power to detain people by blasting them with high intensity Derp Rays.

 

Alanna

Disinfectant Lady

Excretes disinfectant.

 

Maya

Sunkern

Sunkern Sunkern, Sunkern Sunkern Sunkern. SUNKERN!!!

 

Ian

The Soccer Team

He can multiply himself into eleven people, but only one can use their hands.

 

[Unknown]

The Feng Shui Ninja

Messes with the feng shui of the room to make everything uncomfortable.

 

Ashley

The Pit Stopper

The ability to correct all bad driving.

 

Kate Stark

Super Squee

Gain power from relative cuteness from those around her.

 

Jess

The Shipinator

Ships anything, anywhere.

 

Dix

Mod Man

Able to read scrolling text with the greatest of ease and able to ban at the speed of light.

 

Paul

Bass Fisherman

He’s a sound-based superhero. He can cause earthquakes with his low voice. The fishing thing is just to confuse his foes.

 

Beej

2-D Lad

Sees everything at 20/15 but it all looks like it’s printed on a piece of paper. Ironically, aper does not exist to him.

 

Ben W

Ingestro

Can determine any type of poison, but only after ingesting it.

 

Thomas

The Metabolizer

Can convert caloric energy _directly_ into physical/force/electrical energy. Weakness: celery.

 

Andrew

The ‘Shopper

Able to alter the fabric of reality using only a computer.

 

Cameron

Multiple Man

Able to perceive all possible outcomes of decisions, but cannot choose from them.

 

Andre

Conniving Crosstalk

While in a group, he can selectively allow or prevent specific people from hearing conversation, regardless of their position in the group. Weakness: utter silence.

 

Serge

Insomnia

Doesn’t have to sleep — ever! Imagine how much you could get done! Weakness: can’t work faster than a normal person, sleep rays.

 

Ashton

Elephant Man

He remembers everything, which fills him with a terrible, tragic sadness.

 

 

Final lap
November 22, 2013 at 07:15 PM PST
Posted by Ashton

 

final lap

We’re within sight of the finish line, folks.

As I write this, we are at 154-and-one-half hours into about 155+1 of our Desert Bus marathon. It’s been a real privilege to be able to share this journey with you all week, and I am especially lucky to be able to blog you through the home stretch.

It’s been quite a week, with loads of unforgettable moments, and I have a feeling we might still have something special on tap for our grand finale.

What were some of your favorite memories — happy, funny, sad, or anything — from this year’s Desert Bus? Let us know in the comments!

500k
November 22, 2013 at 07:14 PM PST
Posted by Ashton

bnjuvx4

500,000

jUYn6sj

 

What more can we say? Thanks you your amazing support, we have topped half a million dollars. 

We’re up in the stratosphere now, well beyond any past any past Desert Bus, and still going strong, at least for a few more hours.

tomposer

Paul alone has brought in over $100k on his shift alone! That’s more than Desert Bus 1 and 2  combined. The benefits of running anchor it seems.

Veer of

 

The Final Lot
November 22, 2013 at 06:25 PM PST
Posted by Ashton

We have one last item to go under the hammer.

Preview

 

It is a jumbo (approximately 24″ × 36″) signed copy of the official DB7 poster, which comes with a certificate of authenticity.

Note that this item is a much larger version of the poster that is for sale in the LoadingReadyRun Store.

 

Du gamla, Du fria
November 22, 2013 at 05:24 PM PST
Posted by Ashton

 

ikea2

 

 

Honorary citizenships are a rare acclaim indeed. Only one Swede holds an honorary citizenship in Canada, and that is humanitarian Raoul Wallenberg, but we have to wonder whether our Governor General might consider another.

That would be none other than Markus “Notch” Persson, the mastermind behind the paradigm-shattering phenomenon that is Minecraft.

Notch, like his compatriots Mr. Wallenberg and Alfred Nobel, has ever been a friend to humanity. Perhaps never, however, has Mr. Persson’s philanthropy been more apparent than this evening when he donated a kingly sum of $10,000 (yes, ten thousand: a thousand ten times) for a… uh… pack of silica gel James found on the street?

Now, I know we all need H2O to live, but, still, I wonder if SiO2 might be my new favorite triatom.

 

 

 

silicondioxide

 

Bus³
November 22, 2013 at 04:56 PM PST
Posted by Ashton

I call it a “Troika

For those who missed it, James (our ever-reliable leadoff driver) put on a masterclass in Desert Bussery.

Treble

James successfully “Troiking”

No, your eyes are not deceiving you. That is James, with Van Cliburn-esque dexterity, hitting a treble by playing Desert Bus, Desert Bus 2600, and Desert Bus iOS, simultaneously.

Here indeed is a virtuoso at the height of his powers.

Desert Bus rewrites of "The Chemical Worker’s Song (Process Man)”
November 22, 2013 at 04:18 PM PST
Posted by Ashton

Process Bus

Including late submissions, we received a total of 49 entries in Paul’s lyric contest.

And the winner, which has since been sung live on Driver Cam, is…

1

 

The other 48 entries follow. These were super good! Paul said judging was hard.

23 22 21 20 19 18 17 16 15 14 13 12 11 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 49 48 47 46 45 44 43 42 41 40 39 38 37 36 35 34 33 32 31 30 29 28 27 26 25 24

Why not another?
November 22, 2013 at 04:13 PM PST
Posted by Ashton

How about another eleventh hour

Donation Drive?

Sound good?

Good!

0217_01_DB2600

Donate increments of $6.20 until 5:30pm for a chance at

a Desert Bus 2600 Prize Pack

courtesy of the bods at Clever Machine Studios

E-pixel-ary novel
November 22, 2013 at 03:58 PM PST
Posted by Ashton

pixels

In case you missed it on the stream, our comrades-in-arms at Amateur Pixels — who produced the mobile Desert Bus game (available on the Apple Store and Google Play) — dropped a bus-sized donation on us to the tune of $10,602 — a sum which represents their entire proceeds from the game over the course of the past year! Wow!

Aaron wrote into us to tell us about their astounding donation:

Hey guys,

Just poking in with some info about the Android/iOS app proceeds as Kathleen mentioned… The total for this year was $10602 – better than last year and we hope to keep it up for future years! That’s about 15000 players which is just insane! Some links to the game are:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/desert-bus/id470288016
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.tueidj.DesertBus

Cheers, and congrats on another successful year,
– Aaron
– Amateur Pixels

Thanks Aaron! We’re infinitely grateful for your support!

 

 

Graph Orlok
November 22, 2013 at 03:01 PM PST
Posted by Ashton

Graph Spee

OK, so it’s not quite numerically accurate, but, according to our live, real-time graph, with Paul expertly captaining the bus, we have just blasted past the final total for DB6, making this (unofficially) the most successful Desert Bus for Hope to date!!

Way to go!

968full-nosferatu-poster